Prayer ... and Doubt

Repost of my guest post over at Steel Grapes.com.

Recently a friend of mine shared a story with me. It was about a couple who had been through a nasty divorce a few years back. She generally described how bad it was, how much this couple had hurt each other, and some of the things that were said in the midst of the struggle. The good news is, they are apparently now back together, which is an incredible work of God! I mean how many times have you heard of that happening? If you are like me, not many. So why, in the midst of right rejoicing, do I use the word apparently? Because that was the sense, if not the exact word, my friend used to describe the situation.

As I sat there listening to her, I found myself thinking, Why is she doubting it? Wait a minute, why do we do that, why do I do that?? Bad things happen to good people, good people do dumb things, I do dumb things! Like real Christ-followers will, family, friends, and colleagues pray. God answers. We doubt.

Unfortunately, often times it takes someone else's doubt for me to recognize it, but if I am honest, it is so, so there in the deepest place (and sometimes not so deep) in my heart as well. The easiest explanation I can give is to simply blame it on a fallen world, and there is truth in that, but is it the whole truth?

There is an ongoing situation within my own family that brings me back to the same conflict. I pray, we pray. God seems to answer (that's how I always describe it). I doubt the God of the universe who asks me to pray. How silly is that?! When I go to thank him, do I thank him for possibly answering prayer?? I don't think so.

I know that I can't answer the why, not really anyway, not in any way that I can sit back and feel good about myself. But the last time I was confronted with this tension, God showed me what I can do. I can praise him in the midst of my doubt. I can embrace him in his perfect sovereignty and rejoice over renewed unity in my family!! So that is now what I choose to do!! And I have to tell you—it is incredibly freeing! Do I know for sure that it will last? No, I don't. But what do I really know about the future anyway, aside from what God's word says? Not a whole heck of alot. :)

I was able to share a little bit of what God has shown me with my friend. Will she take it to heart? Again, I don't know. But I am thankful. I am thankful for God's grace in the midst of my doubt. I am thankful for authentic community where we can share with each other what God is doing! I am thankful that God does answer prayer and is worth believing!! Who's with me?